Critical Reflection on SEM 2902

Amidst all the intensely science orientated modules such as Computer programming, calculus and computer environment, it definitely was a relief to have a module dedicated towards interpersonal communication. A module as such is something I would typically not have valued or found necessary in our curriculum as I have always had a perception that it’s a waste of time. My perception was as such due to the past experience I have had previously in my polytechnic. During polytechnic, we had not focused much on the content of the module, but rather just a “easy” way to boost up our GPAs.

While in this course, we have had some really interesting and relatable units. Some units I especially enjoyed are knowing self, experiencing and expressing emotions and perceiving others. As we have to constantly work in teams of four people, there was always something we could take away from our lessons and put into application while working with others.

I found the idea of fabricating a story line and relating it back to the substance we learnt over the course. This not only enhanced my creativity, but rather, made it more enjoyable to spend so much time on it. Over the course, we have been talking about interpersonal communication, in terms of verbal and non-communication, and hence, my group and I decided to let our project title revolve around miscommunication.

Since communication is essential in any form of working team, miscommunication was something I thought was very crucial to address. I have also previously found myself in many instances within a group where miscommunication has occurred. In fact, there have been times where my current group has suffered because of miscommunication. Hence, this topic was extremely interesting to present on as not only is it important, but also something I was experiencing simultaneously as we were proceeding with the project.

I was also able to learn a lot from my classmates, for example, reading and commenting on their reflections allowed me to learn the various styles of writing and how differently they would have solved an interpersonal conflict as compared to me. This allowed me to be more understanding towards others and hence, enhance my interpersonal skills.

Overall, I found this course impacting me largely as I now value a lot of the things we’ve learnt in this course. I wouldn’t have thought I would need a course dedicated to interpersonal communication, and I’m surprised as though how much I was able to learn and value the course. The fun activities definitely added to it, and I’m glad I went through it over this semester.

 

Critical Reflection on Project Learning

 

The very first presentation I had ever given would be back when I was 11 years old. It was about a science experiment which had to my surprise won first place in an inter-school competition and hence, my team and I were chosen to deliver our work in front of an audience of over 400 people.

As a relatively shy person, it was a big deal to me, because despite being a performer (dance), I always had stage fright. After that first presentation, I was rather proud of myself and realized I had a passion for speaking, especially so, because I like being heard and contributing to discussions with my opinions in general. I have thus had ample of opportunities to enhance my presenting skills and speak in front of group of people. From being the master of ceremony on various occasions in my school, to participating in debate competitions, to public speaking competitions.

With that being said, when I found out we had to do a presentation for this course I was rather excited for it. But then later realized what a challenge it would be having to work on all the other assignments and projects simultaneously.

Within this course, we had one unit which specifically covered on the topic of presentation skills. We had a few engaging activities which allowed us to not only enhance our knowledge on presentation skills, but also notice some key points of interpersonal skills.

Coming to my presentation in particular, I found myself well prepared as I had a well-organized flow of thought regarding the point that I had to deliver. Having a mock presentation beforehand definitely benefited me vastly as it was then pointed out to me by my peer evaluator that I typically tend to use a lot of pause fillers while I’m presenting in order to cover up for my nervousness and thinking process. I paid special attention to that point and ensured I did not have any pause fillers in my final presentation.

Being among the second batch for the presentation, my group and I certainly had an advantage, not only in terms of the time factor, but also being able to watch the other two groups present and receive feedback on their individual presentations. In fact, I had previously not considered the pace of my speech while delivering. This was something I was made aware of while watching my other peer’s presentation. Typically, I would have rushed through my part in order to stick closely within the time limit. But instead, I decided to follow a decent pace – something I found to be neither too fast nor too slow not worrying too much on the time limit given to us.

I also took notice of my peer’s posture and position while they were delivering their speeches and took notes as to where would be a good position to stand in order to grasp the attention of the audience as well as not clash with the slides.

Some of the areas I can work on based on my presentation would be my nervousness. I found myself articulating certain words incorrectly as I got nervous. I did however try to correct myself after that, but something I can definitely still work on. Another point that was mentioned to me was that my slides had quite a number of bullet points in them. This made is quite hard to follow which point I was talking about and follow accordingly. This is something I wouldn’t have noticed otherwise and something I will surely take note of in my future presentation.

Overall, I was pleased with my delivery and I am glad I was able to learn from my fellow classmate’s presentations as well. Throughout the project duration, I found myself learning more about interpersonal communication and applying the knowledge in communicating better with the audience. It also made me more aware of things I would typically not have paid much attention to such as presentation slide designs, positioning myself and my body posture. As we have a project presentation coming up next Saturday, these are certainly some points I will keep in my mind while I prepare for my presentation and deliver it to the professors.

 

 

 

 

 

Resolving Interpersonal Conflict

Where communication is involved, misunderstandings are bound to happen. Misunderstandings can often lead to many conflicts. According to me, the best way to handle such situations would be to talk it out with the other party and explain your own view point while respecting theirs. With that being said, it is not possible to do so in all situations as some may be more complex compared to others.

In this blog post, I would like to describe out a conflict I had with my older sister a few years ago. I was barely thirteen years old while my sister, who is two years older, was fifteen years old then. We do share a very close bond and in fact were studying in the same school at that time. Like most elder siblings, my sister is very protective of me.

One day, we had decided to pick up our bicycles and ride it around the neighborhood. We went around exploring our way through and while on the way back towards home, we went to Punggol park which is right across the street from my house. The park itself is rather big and my sister and I were cycling in circles around the lake and up and down the slopes. Just then, she had received a phone call from her friend after which she got engaged in a conversation on the phone. Because of this, we had to halt over at a corner until she was done with the conversation. It had been over 20 minutes and I was starting to lose my patience but she was still busy on the call. I started signaling her to hurry it up as it was starting to get really late.  She decided to carry on cycling while talking on the phone, since it was only just across the street.

We reached the lobby of my building and had to mount out bikes up in the locks. Since I was very short then and was not able to lift my bike up, I needed her help in doing so. She, however was still engrossed in the conversation on the phone and asked me to wait for a while longer as she would not have any phone signal at the basement care park where the bikes were to be mounted. I waited about 10 minutes more before I lost my temper. I decided to just do it by myself instead and attempted it anyway. I struggled a lot but somehow managed to do it. I then made my way up to my house. My mother asked me where my sister was and I casually mentioned she was still downstairs with her bike.

I proceeded to relax in the couch and watched television while sipping some mango juice. It had been about thirty minutes, and my sister had still not gotten back home. I started to get annoyed thinking how she might have been on the phone still. The doorbell rang shortly after and there she was, weeping. My mother opened the door and my sister was crying “Rati is missing!!!”  My mother looked towards my direction and started laughing. Confused, my sister entered and saw me sitting in the couch relaxing. I felt the change of emotions in my sister as she started scolding me for scaring her. Apparently, she had been searching for me all around my building, while I was happily back at home. With both of us upset, we had an argument

Sister: “You pig! I was so freaked out, I thought I lost you!”

Me: “well maybe you should have paid less attention on the phone call instead”

Sister: “It was my childhood friend! I rarely get to talk to her!”

Me: “you could have just called her back when you were back home!”

My mother gave in her input: “yeh, Rati is right, you could have just called her back”

Sister: “URGH!” *proceeds to her room and shuts it close*

We didn’t talk until the next evening because we were both egoistic and we dint want to be the first one to admit mistakes.

If you were in my place, how would you have reacted? How could this conflict have been avoided or solved?

Commented on : Keryl, JS

Principles of Supportive Communication – Summary

In the article “principles of supportive communication”, published by Developing Management Skills, the author, Rogers, states that supportive communication should be problem-oriented rather than person-oriented. Instead of focusing on a person’s characteristics, supportive communication should focus on the behavior which would cause the certain problem. Rogers mentions that to have the best interpersonal communication, it is important to ensure congruence when communicating. This means that it is necessary to make sure that what is felt is also delivered.

Supportive communication should be more descriptive compared to being evaluative. As evaluative communication comes off as being judgemental and offensive at times, this can cause arguments and weakening of the interpersonal relationship. Descriptive communication reduces defensive interaction as it becomes more objective which is based on the specific event, behaviour or circumstance. The focus is zoomed in on behaviours and reactions instead of the individual’s characteristics. Invalidating communication generates negativity in each individual’s self-worth, identity, uniqueness and most importantly denies their presence. Through validating communication, the involvement of two-way communication allows people to feel recognized, understood, accepted and valued, that their opinions are appreciated even in the worst case scenarios.

A clear supportive communication is necessary for better understanding on the opposite party. A blunt supportive communication contains extremes and absolutes which will only lead to pressure and confusion. Conjunctive communication allows flow in instruction and explanation. Only in cases like lack of equal opportunities or change in direction during a conversation should there be dis-junction.
Supportive communication is all about personal rather than relative as the source of the ideas belongs to oneself instead of others. Lastly, Rogers also states that listening and responding effectively to someone else’s statement is as important as delivering supportive message.

• Done by JS, Marcus, Ya Wen, Rati

Evaluating Verbal and Nonverbal Behaviour

 

This incident happened during my vacation in the UK. I was standing on the left side of the escalator, just like how I would back home in Singapore. Shortly after, I was graciously warned by a kind lady to stand on the right side instead, as that was the escalator culture over in the UK. Accordingly, I corrected myself and she pointed out an argument taking place at the end of the escalator. She quickly filled me in on what was happening was that this furious local man had lashed out on an Asian lady for not following the elevator etiquette and causing a disruption in the human flow in the escalator. She had done exactly what I had done, standing at the wrong side of the escalator while people were rushing down it. The mid-aged Asian lady was with her son, who looked about 8 years old, while the man was suited up paired with a crisp white shirt neatly tucked in his black trousers and seemed to be around his early forties. Curious as I was close to finding myself in the same situation, I started listening in the conversation.

Man: “You were blocking the way lady! You think anyone would wait because you can’t handle your son?

Lady: “I’m sorry I don’t know it was like this” while frantically moving her hands in desperation to explain her genuine misconception.

Her expression gave away that she was rather frantic with worry and wasn’t too comfortable handling the situation. It was also pretty evident that the lady wasn’t fluent in English, which just added to her discomfort. She proceeded to plead for forgiveness via her hand gestures after which the man decided to understand her perspective and let the matter go, calming the situation. As they parted ways, I started to reflect on how I would have reacted had I been in her situation, since I had barely escaped it thanks to the lady who educated me otherwise. It is indeed impressive how, we as, humans value everyone’s time and comfort as because of this very reason the escalator rules have been implemented, especially in the fast-paced, first world countries such as England and Singapore. However, we must respect the small differences in these countries and behave accordingly.

Although, as a responsible individual, I thought that I was being correct by standing on the left side of the escalator, I am grateful to the lady who very generously corrected me. We must value the different practices when we travel to a place other than our home in order to upset people and avoid situations as that faced by the Asian lady and the man. This incident taught me further to always observe, adapt and inquire (in doubtful cases) about other cultures and different practices. This way, I would be able to relate to people from different backgrounds and connect with them easily whenever I travel.

To add on, when people from different cultural backgrounds interact, communication can certainly be a challenge. What aids it are nonverbal cues, which we use in our daily lives. In this incident, some of the nonverbal cues that can be picked up would be the lady’s expression and her hand gestures. With that being said, there are cases where nonverbal communication can be misinterpreted, for example, in the European culture, pecking the cheek is a typical way to greet the other party. However, Asians are rather conservative and we would consider that as a big no-no. Hence, it is important to not jump into conclusions too easily and give a thought about the signals we receive, as well as give others.

Imagine yourself in a situation like this, you are in a foreign land with absolutely no knowledge of the culture and practices there. How would you react?

Anticipating all your responses!

 

• edited on 16th February 2016

commented on:

• Syai(7 Cs)
• Lin Zaw
• Marcus

Strengths and Challenges in Communicating

 

“Everyone has their own ways of expression. I believe we all have a lot to say but finding ways to say it is more than half the battle.” -Criss Jami. This quote perfectly describes just how important communication is and why it is important for us to develop good communication habits.
I’ve always been shy and rather nervous around people, and that, I would consider to be my weakness in communication. So much so, I even messed up the national pledge in front of my entire school on once (so embarrassing but I definitely laugh about it now). If you have any suggestion so that I can overcome this weakness, please do leave it in the comments.

However,  I have tried to overcome it by engaging myself in various activities that involved public speaking and expressing myself more which gave me opportunities to boost up my confidence and ignite a passion for speaking. There certainly still lies room for improvement though.

One of my strengths in communication is that I am an active listener and I pay special attention to making sure the other party knows I am giving them my full attention. I like to do so by maintaining eye contact and showing enthusiasm in the conversation or simply just nodding along. Another one of my strengths is that I am able to consider the other person’s perspective beforehand and approach various types of people differently. For example, when approaching someone more sensitive, I wouldn’t be too loud, less harsh. This, I believe, allows me to be more approachable and welcoming to have a conversation with.

• Edited on 29th January 2016

Blogs commented on:

• Daphne
• Angela
• Zong Hong